Looking back and forth

Its been a while since i last wrote here. My life is kind of getting back on track, even if it is like ages since i had a normal proper entry. But hey, emotions are the worst things to be attacked by. Anyone with a heart can testify to that. Life has gone back on track in the sense I'm finally gettin my colour back to my cheeks, my weight's now regulatin and my meals are more regular.

Emotional spurts were common place in the past and i guess now ive kinda grown out of that. I used to sit on my roof to ponder and think and smoke. Now i guess when i need a puff to steady myself, my garden suffices and even though sometimes i might stay out all night in the garden, I come back in the morning with a smile on my face. I had no troubles to think of, but i reminice of all the joys ive had before. My emotions surge but i simply breathe and relax. After all, memories will stay as memories. The sweet ones must not serve as a catalyst to bitterness after all.

Things have been said about me by people I dislike. Things have been told to me because of reasons not known to me. Funny thing is I dont get angry half the time. Why? Because my ego has been swelling so rapidly lately its become annoying. They hate me only because they realise no matter how they look at it they are in the end inferior to me in ways that truly matter. My friends have begun returning to me, even though some have given up on me on this journey that i undertook months ago, some have returned and for that i am grateful.

It has taken dozens of people, all singing the same thing for me to slowly stand up. It hasnt been easy and no my personality will never be the same ever again. Ive evolved so rapidly that a few people dont recognize me because of what i have become. Its a refreshing feeling. Yet, how i evolve is dependant on the people around me. Because no matter how independant I am, the shockwaves injected into my life by these precious people will be the ones to force me into the shape i am today.

I cant write more, but i will continue on this. This entry will take a while to write. But right now, i am tired and i need sleep.

Peace